July 20

Twenty years ago yesterday I married this guy.


That was a really good idea. (Although when he wakes up tomorrow morning and sees that I wrote this he's going to kill me.)

Twenty years of marriage means that it's also been twenty years since we moved to New York. Just a couple months out of college, we drove a giant U-Haul truck out here with our belongings tied up in a little corner of the truck because it was the smallest vehicle the rental company would give us. We carried boxes and boxes (of books, mostly) up to our tiny third-floor apartment on a very hot, sticky day. A lot like today, come to think of it. We slept on the floor of our un-air-conditioned apartment until our sofa bed arrived a few weeks later. (The sofa bed wasn't much of an improvement from the floor, trust me. Somehow we slept on that awful thing for almost five years until we moved to a larger apartment, and then we went out and bought the most comfortable bed we could find.)

I started my first job a day or two after we moved in. Todd started graduate school shortly after that. We barely got by; but we were thrilled to be married, living in New York, and pursuing our dreams.

Since then we've both made several career changes. And we had a kid. And I've never really talked about it here, but two and a half years ago Todd quit his job and joined me in my business. So it's no longer my business, but our business. Now he runs things (far more smoothly and efficiently than I ever did, believe me) and I do what I do best (which doesn't include nearly as many things as he does), and that allows us both to spend more time together and with the kiddo.

I can tell you that being married and rearing a child and running a business together are far more challenging than either of us expected. Our studio and our apartment are both very small spaces, and sometimes the only way to make things work is to each be in a different place for at least part of the time. We can each be in charge independently that way, at least until dinnertime.

But when I stop to think about it all, I wouldn't want to have done it any other way. We still have fun together. We have similar interests and can appreciate each other's interests even when they aren't shared. We have very different senses of humor, but he can still make me laugh. And I'm ecstatic when I can make him laugh every once in a while.

We were very young when we got married. Many, many things have changed in our lives in that time span. But I'd do it again, given the chance.

I hope we get another twenty (or more?) years together.



And he does look like Heather's illustration of him, doesn't he?