Nearly extinct birds not found in the Audubon guide

Family: Small Red-Breasted Bushsitter
Genus: Cottonus Handstitchedus

The Small Red-Breasted Bushsetter is not abundant, even in New York. It is found mostly between 16th Street and 13th Street in Manhattan's East Village but occasionally makes its way to New Jersey via post.

Its food consists primarily of organic CSA produce and home-cooked meals. Although not shy with respect to people, it takes particular notice of children and short-tempered cats.

The flight of the Small Red-Breasted Bushsitter is performed by short falling spells, mostly off tables and counters, followed by the piercing cry of "Mom!!!"

(sent to my sister in New Jersey)

Family: Short-Billed City Wren
Genus: Linenus Floralus-Bellyus

This tiny bird makes its nest in messy, over-crowded sewing workrooms where its occasional mating call sounds a suspiciously like a wail of frustration. It prefers to make its nest from scraps of fabric and knotted threads, and it tends to be a bit of a night-owl since that's the most efficient time for working. The short-billed city wren is always in a hurry, often forgets to eat lunch, and doesn't have time to get its eyebrows waxed for months in a row. This is a water bird that seldom sees time in the pool due to it's overbooked work load.

The short-billed city wren tends to overcommit itself, is far too enthusiastic about too many ideas and projects than the actual time availabile to follow up, and tends to overwhelm its spouse with ideas and requests for help.

(awaiting a home while perched temporarily in my studio)

Genus: Tuquoise-bellied Jay
Family: Piratus painterus

This unusal bird is rumored to enjoy the scent of acrylic paint and occasionally takes up residence near computers and in home offices. It enjoys contemporary art and appreciates minimalist design, and it loves to cook delicious meals while listening to public radio. It's flight is restricted exclusively to short bicycle rides. The subsists exclusively on Artisinal cheese and an occasional bit of trotter at the famous St. John in London.

(given to my studio-mate, Michelle)


(Bird pattern from Joelle's book. Fast and fun to make, especially when hand-sewn.)